The first White House Correspondents’ Dinner of the Obama years was this past Saturday. Check it all out here.
Now that this whole Wanda Sykes “Oh-no-you-didn’t!” business is blowing over, let’s do a quick recap of what President Obama said… and didn’t say.
Jokes we heard:
- “Wishing all a happy mother’s day, a difficult time for Rahm Emmanuel who’s unused to saying the word day after mother.”
- “I’d like to welcome you all to the ten-day anniversary of my first one hundred days. I’m Barack Obama. Most of you covered me. All of you voted for me. Apologies to the Fox table.”
- “Sasha and Malia aren’t here tonight because they are grounded. You can’t just take Air Force One on a joyride around Manhattan. I don’t care whose kids you are.”
- “In the next hundred days, we will house train our dog Bo – because the last thing Tim Geithner needs is someone else treating him like a fire hydrant.”
- “David Axelrod is here. We’ve been together a long time. I can still remember when I called Ax a few years ago and said, ‘You and I can do wonderful things together.’ And he said to me the same thing that partners across America are saying to one another right now: ‘Let’s go to Iowa and make it official.’ ”
- “During the second hundred days, we will design, build, and open a library dedicated to my first hundred days. In the next hundred days, I will learn to go off prompter – and Joe Biden will learn to stay on it.”
Jokes we could have heard:
- “I was going to give Joe Biden the reins tonight but he wouldn’t attend; it wasn’t that he didn’t think he could stay on message, it was that he felt it was not healthy to be stuck with such a large crowd in a confined space.”
- “Al Franken is here. Everyone, congratulations to him on finally making it to Capitol Hill. Oh, what’s that? I am being told he is here strictly in his capacity as comedian.”
- “Arlen Specter is here, an outstanding public servant, give it up for him. Where is he? He was seated to my right before, now I think he switched tables and settled on my left…”
- “You’ll notice Governor Rick Perry of Texas is not here. He is meeting with his exploratory committee on running for president… of Texas.”
- “Ashton Kutcher is here with the lovely Demi Moore of course. I am particularly happy to have him: this is going to result in thousands more Twitter friends for me.”
- “Representing Hope and Change is taking its toll on me. I’ve lost my youthful look. That’s why I am using Just-For-Men Gel to shake off this salt-and-pepper look so that future employers will take me seriously at my age.”