In our culture, brimming with brand barrages and sponsorship strafings, stepping back to consider the commercial colloquialisms of our media metabolism is eye opening. (Good thing I didn’t have to read that off a teleprompter.) So many of the same meaningless, vapid phrases are regurgitated and force-fed to us hourly, it can make you can feel like a duck being groomed for foie gras.
Space in print and time on television are costly and limited, so it’s amazing that these taken-for-granted lines have survived from Mad Men days until now, as they add remarkably little. Let me explicate in translating Adman to Layman:
“Fun for the whole family!” is a guaranteed miserable time for at least half of the family.
Is it physiologically possible for Mom and/or Dad to enjoy Space Chimps? Can their toddler’s teenage sister tolerate The Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl without texting her friends? That’s ¾ of a quasi-generic family right off the bat struggling to pay attention in the theater with more difficulty than a George Washington Bridge security guard. Instead, advertisers should be clear and direct: “Kids love it!” Parents know that this means they can entertain their tykes for a few hours at a flick without too many tantrums or complaints. (Ohhh, nevermind, now I get it. This is cunning copy. Advertisers are leveling with the target: as a parent, any time without tantrums and complaints is considered fun.)
